Kelli. in real life

Are We There Yet?

Growing up my parents drove to almost every vacation destination we had. Williamsburg 8 hours, Ocean City, 9 hours, Myrtle Beach 14 hours. I would lay out my blanket, pillow, books and journals perfectly in the back seat. I kept myself occupied most of the trip, but usually about half way through I'd begin to ask the ever famous question, "Are We There Yet?" This question usually triggered an irritable response from my mother especially, so I'd warm up with, "How much longer?"

During the last few weeks in my morning devotion the Holy Spirit has "politely" reminded me that I have reverted to some childish ways. I've allowed the opinions of others and the imaginary "time table" life's pressures can create for us to make me feel as if I'm behind schedule or wasting time. Alot of the people in the industries I'm involved in are single or male and are able to pick up and go or network at leisure. But I made the choice to get married and have a family, which was the RIGHT choice for me. Instead of celebrating this season, I've been so eager about "what's next", "how much longer"..."are we there yet?".

Through scripture the Lord reminded me of the stability of his plans. 

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29 :11 (NIV)

He knows my future, but He understands the process. He's mapped out a path for my life and its up to me to trust Him to guide me, without looking to the left or right to see if I'm "measuring up" with others expectations. 

Mark Batterson  summed it up well for me this morning....

He is far more concerned aboutwho you're becoming in the process than when you arrive at your destination. Maybe you need to quit praying for deliverance andstart praying for revelation. 

I love it. 

God is more worried about me not only growing, but comprehending, understanding, and becoming more like me in my character, than he is the actual destination. Its His will that I'm MATURE enough to handle my destiny, rather than accepting a place or way of life I am in truth too immature for. 

Be encouraged today. The process may be long, but it will reap the fruit of the Spirit of God, and HIS fruit always endures, and HIS timing is always right. 

The GOSPEL

I have a confession to make. 

I was "this close" to giving up on gospel music. 

I've gotten tired of the "feel good" no scripturally based music, entertainment focused music that has come from the gospel music industry in the last few years. Being that Ive been a background vocalist for 3 major gospel artists, it broke my heart to be disheartened by much of the music I heard from various artists. 

Nothing wrong with expressing one's music ability and versatility.

But the world around us is dying, and we as believers are called to preach, sing, and witness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Its more than a melody.

More than a catchy phrase. 

Its the TRUTH that can transform lives. 

This morning, my faith was restored. 

 I met Donald Lawrence when I was a teenager. I was singing with a group led by a singer named, "Keith Dobbins". I was amazed at the raw talent of Donald's singers. I knew all the songs, had the albums, and even thought Donald was cute. ( lol) In other words I've always enjoyed his music for various reasons. But this morning, the music God gave Him RENEWED me in such a way that only music full of Gods word and anointing can. Songs like, "The Blessing is On You", "The Word of the Lord", and "There is a King in You"...filled to the brim with the LIVING word of God. How powerful when we decree the word of the Lord OUT LOUD. Gospel may not be your genre of choice, but do yourself a favor and look into this project. 

Just read a few words from the song the Blessing is on You

"The Lord has made a covenant with you

He has promised that He would bless you

You are in the earth but you live above the curse

You are kingdom you have rights

Blessings come with no struggle or fight

So when recession comes you won't be effected

When sickness comes you'll have good health

The dollar may fail, your wealth will increase

War all around, you'll be at peace"

Dear believer,

Dear friend who knows there is a God but needs to hear His voice.....

Get this cd and be encouraged.....

I dare you to believe

The blessing is on YOU

Signs and Wonder(ings)

I'm not afraid of driving.

Anywhere.

Big cities.

Rural areas.

Curvy mountains.

I'm not afraid.

As long as there are signs to tell me which way to go; I can easily follow directions.

That's how I feel in my life right now.

I'm not afraid of moving.

Anywhere....uh...in these United States : )

A big city.

The country.

Fast paced, slow paced.

Wherever.

or right here where I am.

I'm not afraid.

WE (my husband and I) are not afraid.

We're simply looking for a SIGN.

One of the most difficult things about being multi-talented is knowing that you are not living and giving at your full potential. It's hard to live at "acceptable" when you know God is calling for "excellence". It eats at you to "drive" on 4 cylinders when you know God's designed you to run like a V8.

We've gotten to the point where our "desires" are completely determined on what God wants for us. We just want our lives to be lived for the upbuilding of His kingdom, the spreading of His truth, and in a way that combines music and ministry.

We're ready to move.

We're ready to stay.

We're just waiting on God's directions and open doors.

It would make things so much easier if there were "signs" telling us what to do.

Stay. Go. Move. Stand still. Turn. Bend. Steep Hill. Bump in the Road.

Unfortunately, listening for the voice and instructions of God isn't always that simple.

All we can do is wait.

Until then, we can only do our best to "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication make our requests made known unto God. "

Easier said than done.

Just another Manic Monday

I woke up this morning in a BAD mood. I was in the midst of a misunderstanding with a dear friend, and the whole thing has exhausted me emotionally. I HATE to be misunderstood, and I HATE to know that I have not taken the time or energy necessary to truly understand someone.
I felt bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness rising up in me, instead of the love I had asked God to stir up within me. All these self-centered emotions tried to overtake my mind, and fighting them left me mentally tired.

If that weren't enough, one of my childhood friends gave birth to a beautiful baby boy today. I was thrilled for her and her husband. But my heart was grieving as well. Our due dates were 2 weeks apart. The birth of her 2nd son reminded me that I had lost my 2nd son in March. Today, I would've been 38 weeks pregnant. I would've been round, irritable, disgustingly hot and uncomfortable, and I would've been so happy to be that way. It was a bittersweet moment; thanking God for bringing baby Nathaniel into this world safely; but also asking God to continue to comfort me in the loss of my son Christian.

By this evening when my friend called, I was a wreck. It was only the grace of God that we were able to plow through our differences and come to a resolve. Granted it, neither one of us agreed with the other's perception; nevertheless we came to a resolve.

Its been a rough day for me. But somewhere someone didn't have anything to eat. Somewhere a person lost their job. Somewhere a person was physically abused by a spouse or significant other. Someone died today.

And here I am...
with a roof over my head
a job
a beautiful son
a loving husband
just enough food in the fridge
and Im alive.

Thank you God for bringing me through this day. I couldn't have made it without you

A Rose for Ruthie

Last week I got a call that shook me on the inside.
My cousin Ruth (known as Ruthie to me) took her own life.
She was 24.

My cousin Trina (Ruthie's sister) is only a year or 2 older than me, so naturally I was closer to her. But Ruthie belonged to all of us. There are 5 of us cousins, all girls, right around the same age, that spent summers together, talked about boys together, had pillow fights, got in trouble together, and loved each other like sisters instead of cousins. Ruthie was so much younger that we often left her out; but we loved her to pieces. She would whine when we left her out, and follow us around until we finally paid her attention.

Ruthie was lovable. She had a giant, infectious smile that would literally light up a room.

My heart is broken tonight when I think of her smile. I wish that our familys love for her would've been enough to keep her here. I wish that she had known God in a more personal way, and that His love had overshadowed the darkness she may have felt and seen all around her.

Death has a way of reminding us of what's important. I'm a verbal person. I don't have a hard time telling those I care about that I love them, or enjoy them being a part of my life. I'm pretty affectionate. I love hard: sometimes to a fault. Ruthie and I were alike in that way. She always said I love you, even if she had told you moments before. In fact those were her last words. "I Love You" sent by a mass text message just before she took her life.

Today I felt faint as I sat quietly at the funeral, I thought of the day and time we live in. We are pressed on every side as the bible says. There are so many silent battles people are facing on a daily basis. Many people are one step away from suicide, depression, or even insanity. What if something I said; a song I sang, or just my presence could be used by God to "grab" someone JUST before they let go?

I want to be used as a "life-saver". A tool that God tosses out into a deep ocean to save someone who is drowning.

I wish I had been there for Ruthie.

Ruth, here's a rose for you. A beautiful rose to express to you how much you had inside of you. So many layers; but so much beauty.

I will miss you.

~Kelli Rose

Here's My Hand

My friends are very important to me.
I've got associates, acquaintances, church family, friends and family.
Most of my closest friends are considered a part of my family.

A few years ago , I moved to Michigan and was separated from some of my closest and dearest friends that I was used to seeing on a daily basis. Now I've got close friends here, and close friends miles away. But I love that no distance and no familiarity changes the connection between us.

One of my dearest friends is hurting emotionally. She's a strong individual, and her faith in God is solid. But we're all human, and when disappointments come it's natural for us to hurt.

On Friday before I even knew what was going on in detail with my friend; I began to weep and call our her name in prayer. It was less than an hour later that I understood why I had felt such a burden for her.

Friendship is one of the most precious types of relationships God has gifted us with. While marriage brings about a connection of romance, sexual intimacy, and the building of a family; even a marriage is quite fragile with out the two individuals ( man and a woman) first being FRIENDS. Friendship is the ability to let down your guard and allow a person to take up space in your heart; the ability to laugh together, cry together, hurt one another, forgive one another, believe in each other, and remain committed without any paperwork or ceremony.

Today I just wish I could hold my dear friends hand as a point of contact.

I'd stand right by her side without inhibition. I'd allow the pure and untainted love of God to flow through me, as I held her hand; saying nothing; just there to be there.

Sometimes no words can heal us like the sense of touch can.

Sometimes we can't even find the words to describe the emotions we feel.

But "touch" transcends even words and feelings.

I just wish I was there to hold her hand like little girls do when they're finished playing dolls, or skipping down a path, or just glad to see one another.

I'd hold her hand, and let her know...."Everything is going to be alright. But until it is.....I'm right here."