Have No Fear

When I was little I was fascinated with superheroes. 

Superman, Superwoman, Batman, Suzzette Smurf. 

I loved them because they seemed invincible. They had amazing powers to do almost anything they wanted. Plus, they had the best lines was, "Have No Fear"....and then they'd either rescue someone, fight an enemy, or fly or twirl around really fast. 

(All except for Suzzette Smurf. I just thought she was brave for living around all those boys)

Have no fear, huh?  That's been a tough concept for me to grasp, even though I'm in relationship with the greatest of superheroes; Jesus Christ. 

I've talked before about struggling with fear, anxiety, worry, and doubt; almost on a daily basis. I have to literally quote meditate on scriptures and feed myself the word of God and encouraging words to fight off anxiety. 

Just before Christmas I found out that I'm pregnant again with what would have been our 3rd child. I've written many times about losing Christian back in March, and what a difficult loss it was to recover from. When I saw the plus sign on the "pee pee" stick (as I like to call it) I was filled with mixed emotions; I was thrilled speechless until all that would come out of my mouth was a screaming like sound that sounded more like a whale in heat. 

I was also AFRAID. 

Fear gripped me. 

I was afraid of my husband's response. 

I was afraid of the financial strain if I end up having to quit my job. 

I was afraid of losing the baby. 

And I realized that fear was the reason I didn't tell people. I was afraid people would say, "you should probably wait to say anything...just in case you miscarry."

I was afraid people would feel pitiful for me, and instead of BELIEVING God with me, they'd just "hope for the best". 

I've been wrecking my brain every day, making sure I still feel certain symptoms. The moment I don't; I become afraid and bombard myself with "what ifs". 

Fear is torment. 

I can't live like that.

"FOR GOD HAS NOT GIVEN US THE SPIRIT OF FEAR, BUT OF POWER, AND LOVE, AND OF A SOUND MIND" -II Timothy 1:7 

"FEAR NOT, FOR I AM WITH THEE, AND I WILL BLESS THEE" -Genesis 26: 24

I've been eating these scriptures like candy. 

I have concluded, that whatever happens, my God is with me. He won't leave me. He knows my hearts desire, and He is able to do more than I can ask or think. 

So this baby, this pregnancy, this anxious woman....is in HIS HANDS. 

Comments

[Hazel]

Kelli, the 91st Psalm has helped me when standing against fear. I love to meditate on scriptures! Confessing them out loud really works! This is such a time of blessing for you and your family and I hate it(though I'm not surprised) that fear is trying to take its toll. You stay strong in the Lord by continuing to meditate on His Word and not any thoughts from the enemy. I'll pray for you. Be blessed! Hazel

He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty [Whose power no foe can withstand].

I will say of the Lord, He is my Refuge and my Fortress, my God; on Him I lean and rely, and in Him I [confidently] trust!

For [then] He will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence.

[Then] He will cover you with His pinions, and under His wings shall you trust and find refuge; His truth and His faithfulness are a shield and a buckler.

You shall not be afraid of the terror of the night, nor of the arrow (the evil plots and slanders of the wicked) that flies by day,

Nor of the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor of the destruction and sudden death that surprise and lay waste at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand, but it shall not come near you.

Only a spectator shall you be [yourself inaccessible in the secret place of the Most High] as you witness the reward of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord your refuge, and the Most High your dwelling place,

There shall no evil befall you, nor any plague or calamity come near your tent.

For He will give His angels [especial] charge over you to accompany and defend and preserve you in all your ways [of obedience and service].

You shall tread upon the lion and adder; the young lion and the serpent shall you trample underfoot.

Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore will I deliver him; I will set him on high, because he knows and understands My name [has a personal knowledge of My mercy, love, and kindness- trusts and relies on Me, knowing I will never forsake him, no, never].

He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him My salvation.

Psalm 91 Amplified Bible